


The Most Awkward Boner Of All Time

by PendulumDeath



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Crack, Humor, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-12
Updated: 2014-02-12
Packaged: 2018-01-12 01:32:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1180316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PendulumDeath/pseuds/PendulumDeath
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Every time Levi bends over, Eren can't help but want to fuck him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Most Awkward Boner Of All Time

**Author's Note:**

> Original Prompt: http://snkkink.dreamwidth.org/8414.html?thread=6729182#cmt6729182

There were many things to be said about Captain Levi, many of which Eren didn't exactly care about, but from all of those things, there was only one that tormented the teenager more than anything else. Every day, and especially every night, it tortured him with such intensity that it sometimes left him breathless. What could it be you ask? The answer is quite simple.   
  
DAT ASS!   
  
Yes, that perfectly round ass his Captain had no problem in flaunting around. It didn't even matter that the man wasn't doing it on purpose, or if it didn't even look like flaunting to anyone else but him, because Levi was doing it, and Eren always found it impossible not to stare each time they ended up occupying the same space.   
  
Did the man even have to bend that freakin' often? It was common knowledge that cleaning was Levi's obsession, but did his Captain have even the slightest idea what he was doing to him each time he bent over and put on display those two mouth-watering mounds of unmarred skin and well-trained muscles? They had to be unmarred, and soft, and they were so freakin' delicious-looking in those tight pants that Eren wanted nothing more than to sink his teeth into them. Well, almost, there was actually something else he wanted to do a lot more when it came to Levi. What he truly wanted was to ride that ass like there was no tomorrow. Just ride it, sink his shaft into it so deeply that he wouldn't even be able to tell where he ended and where Levi started.   
  
"What are you standing there for, Eren? Keep working, this place is still as filthy as it was five minutes ago. "Eren...?"   
  
"Ah, sorry Captain, I was just thinking," Eren answered while wiping some drool off the corner of his mouth.   
  
"What were you thinking about, you shitty brat? That we have all day to wait around while you waste time instead of doing your job?"   
  
"No, Captain! Nothing like that, I was just..." Eren said sheepishly, awkwardly scratching the back of his head.   
  
"Get to work, now!"   
  
Eren winced and did as he was told, but that didn't mean ― obviously ― that he would actually give cleaning one hundred percent of his attention. How could anything else be more important than his Captain's sexy body? It wasn't just the ass, no, it was everything! Full package really, except for his personality, which could've been better, but Eren wasn't about to complain.

"Goddam brat," Levi snapped, "what the hell is wrong with you today?"   
  
"Sorry, Captain!" he answered in one breathe and rushed to start cleaning, only to trip on the goddamn bucket ― that Levi somehow left in the middle of the room ― and fall head-first onto the floor. Normal people would've seen stars from such a hit, but he ended up seeing a bunch of Levis instead. Was he that obsessed with the man, he wondered, not yet realizing what had just happened.   
  
"Wow, you little shit," Levi shook his head, slightly amused. "I thought I told you not to change into a titan without permission."   
  
Eren's only answer was a grunt, and before he even had a chance to open his eyes, he was grabbed by the hair so tightly that he ended up yelping in pain. "C-captain?" he said in a trembling voice while trying to zoom in on the face mere inches away from his. Apparently, Levi was unhappy with something because the grip in his hair tightened.   
  
"Explain this," Levi half-growled, half-snickered.   
  
"Huh..."   
  
"This," Levi hissed, and Eren followed his gaze downwards until his eyes fell on something that he never expected to see coming out as a part of his titan body.   
  
He shrieked then, a feeling of mortification draining the color from his face. "Why now?! I c-can... I can expl-explain this," Eren stuttered.   
  
Levi snorted. "I'm sure you can, brat," and with that he let go of the black locks, the person attached to said locks barely having enough energy to keep standing.   
  
"What did I hear just now? Did Eren transform into a titan by any chance?" Hange squealed from somewhere down the hallway.   
  
With a speed that only he could possess, Levi was flying past Eren and closing the door before the crazy woman even had a chance to take a peek inside.   
  
"Nothing happened. Eren tripped over the bucket."  
  
"What about the sound?" she whined from behind the door.   
  
"Just the water, Hange. Now go back to work."   
  
"But―"   
  
"No butts, Hange, just go," Levi ordered, his tone leaving no room for discussion.   
  
They both waited quietly until her footsteps receded, and when Levi turned towards him, Eren barely had any time to react before the Captain's weapon made a clean cut of what had to be the most awkward boner of all time. Eren actually screamed, his Captain's action equally unexpected and horrifying. From where the hell did he even pull out that weapon?   
  
"Now get back to work," Levi commanded, as though he hadn't just seen a giant skinless titan boner. _Nope, never saw it; it must've been my imagination,_ he kept telling himself, but he couldn't help a knowing smirk from gracing his lips when he saw how embarrassed Eren was.


End file.
